Lost in music

My fingers tear across the hard brass strings.
They ache to find the right note
the right chord
to trigger my memory.
I found you once in a diminished B 7
but you vanished and moved on
and I’ve been playing ever since.
And what if you’re a melody,
Lost in a pattern in these goddamned frets.
Then I’ll learn to write songs
like I learned to play guitar.
I’ll find you, I swear,
and I’ll play you until I fall asleep.
I’ll play you until I bleed.
I’ll play you until I remember
or hallucinate the feeling
of your beautiful, calloused fingers on my face.

I don’t wear silver anymore

I can’t count the spaces between us
The months and the hours
I don’t know what’s longer
I can’t think of the places I’ve been to
thinking I’d find you
I don’t know who’s farther from home

I’ve searched all your favorite places
I guess all I have to say is
I don’t wear silver anymore

I can’t count the times that I cried
the silence, the screaming
I don’t know what’s louder
I can’t find the will to move on
thinking you’ll find me
I don’t know who’s further from home

I can’t spend another night on the freeway
I don’t know what state you’re in anyway
another dime in the pay phone, just wanted to say
hello I’m not okay

I’ve searched all your favorite places
I guess all I have to say is
I don’t wear silver anymore.